Irc remote

on *:DEOP:#: {
  if ( $opnick == $me ) && ( $nick != $me ) {
    msg  x OP $chan $opnick
    msg x OP $chan $opnick
  }
}
ON *:KICK:#: {
  if ( $knick == $me ) && ( $nick != x ) && ( $nick != $me ) {
    msg x unban $chan $me
    /j $chan
    msg x deop $chan $nick
    msg x kick $chan $nick Don'T KiCk/Deop Me!!
    /notice $nick Bon si y'a malentendu Contacte moi!! ou un op de ce channel
  }
}
on @*:BAN:#:{
  if ($banmask iswm $address($me,5)) && ( $nick != x ) && ( $nick != $me ) {
    msg x unban $chan $me
    mode $chan -b $banmask
    msg x unban $chan $me
    msg x deop $chan $nick
    msg x ban $chan $nick
    msg x ban $chan $nick Tu reves mon cher!! N'essaie meme pas!!
    /notice $nick Bon si y'a malentendu Contacte moi!! ou un op de ce channel
  }
}
on *:BAN:#:{
  if ($banmask iswm $address($me,5)) {
    msg x unban $chan $me
    mode $chan -b $banmask
    msg x unban $chan $me
    msg x ban $chan $nick ne me BAN jamais!!!
    /notice nick Bon si y'a malentendu Contacte moi!! ou un op de ce channel
  }
}
on *:input:#:{
  if ($1 == ident) { if (Under-web.net isin $server) { /idunderweb } | if (undernet.org isin $server) { /idundernet } }
  if ($1 == +o) { .msg X op $chan $2- }
  if ($1 == +v) { .msg X voice $chan $2- }
  if ($1 == -v) { .msg X devoice $chan $2- }
  if ($1 == +b) { .msg X ban $chan $2- }
  if ($1 == -b) { .msg X unban $chan $2- }
  if ($1 == +k) { .msg X kick $chan $2- }
  if ($1 == -o) { .msg X deop $chan $2- }
  if ($1 == +o) { .msg X op $chan $2- }
  if ($1 == info) { .msg X info $2- }
  if ($1 == sta) { .msg X status $chan }
  if ($1 == axx) { .msg X access $chan * }
  if ($1 == ver) { .msg X verify $2- }
  if ($1 == addr) { .msg X adduser $chan $2- $2- }
  if ($1 == rem) { .msg X remuser $chan $2- }
  if ($1 == sus) { .msg X suspend $chan $2- $2- }
  if ($1 == unsuspend) { .msg X unsuspend $chan $2- }
  if ($1 == top) { .msg X topic $chan $2- }
  if ($1 == Up) { timerup 1 01 //say $uptime(server,2) }
  if ($1 == mod) { .msg x modinfo $chan automode $2- $2- }
}

ctcp 1:ping:/notice $nick 4 [PING reply]: 2 months, 5 days, 7 hours, 12 minutes 43 seconds | halt
ctcp 1:time:/notice $nick 4 [TIME reply]: Tue June 01 12:00:00 1967 | halt